One of the most common questions I hear from clients is some version of this: How do I set my kids up for success without making them dependent on me?

It’s a tension many parents feel, especially those who have the means to help. You want to give your children every advantage, but you also know that simply handing them whatever they need can backfire.

So how do you raise savvy, financially confident kids who have a healthy relationship with money?

The True Power of Financial Confidence

When I think about why early money habits really matter, it comes down to one word: optionality – the ability to choose without financial pressure. And that may be one of the greatest gifts financial independence can provide.

Financial independence gives your children the freedom to:

• Pursue a career they’re passionate about instead of one chosen simply to pay the bills
• Take thoughtful, calculated risks
• Say no to opportunities that don’t align with their values, because they’re not driven by desperation for a paycheck

Financial dependency quietly limits those same choices.

Even with the best intentions, stepping in too often can keep adult children tethered to decisions they wouldn’t make on their own. I see versions of this dynamic play out regularly in my work with families.

Neither approach is right or wrong, but the outcomes are different. Independence creates options. Dependency narrows them.

Guiding the Next Generation

Teaching kids about money used to be more tangible. I remember going to the bank with my parents, watching them fill out deposit slips, and adding entries to my own savings passbook. The numbers were real and the tradeoffs were visible.

Today, money is abstract. There’s rarely a physical exchange or a register to balance, a reality that makes debt dangerously easy to accumulate. When money moves with a tap or swipe, it’s easy to lose the emotional connection to what’s being spent. Without a clear sense of what money represents, young people can slide into financial patterns that take years to undo.

Building Habits Through the Years

What you teach your kids about money depends on where they are developmentally. A kindergartner needs different lessons than a college student, but the foundation stays the same as they grow up: clarity reduces anxiety, and practice builds confidence.

Elementary and Middle School Years

Focus on establishing the basics:

• Understanding needs vs. wants
• Practicing delayed gratification
• Introducing saving with intention

Needs tend to happen monthly: food, shelter, basic clothing. Wants can be planned for and earned over time.

Growing up, my parents told us that any money we put into our savings account, they would match. The spending account was just what we deposited, but savings got doubled. 

I still use this approach with my own kids because it taught us how to delay gratification and planted the seed for understanding how matching works in the real world. When you eventually get a job with a 401(k) match, you already get the principle.

Apps like Greenlight make this easier to manage. My kids have separate buckets for spending, saving, and giving. When they put money into savings or giving, I match it. We’re saving for a car right now. As they see the balance grow, it’s easier for them to understand the compounding value of delayed gratification.

High School years

Teenagers can handle more sophisticated conversations about debt, how credit cards work, and why interest compounds against you when you carry a balance. Show them what happens when you borrow money for something you can’t afford outright.

This is also a good time to introduce budgeting as a formal practice. Give them a fixed amount to manage, whether it’s an allowance, earnings from a job, or a combination. Let them make decisions and experience the consequences. 

If you want a starting point, we’ve put together a simple budgeting worksheet that helps teens track income, expenses, and savings goals.

College and early career

Young adults face real financial decisions: student loans, first apartments, and entry-level salaries that don’t stretch as far as they’d like. The habits they build early will either help them or haunt them.

One of the most important lessons for this stage is to contribute enough to your 401(k) to get the full employer match (the same principle we practiced in childhood). If your employer matches up to 6% of your salary, put in at least 6%. If you can afford more, do more, but never leave the match on the table.

To help illustrate the power of starting early, we created a Saver vs. Procrastinator comparison tool that shows the dramatic difference between someone who starts saving at 22 and someone who waits until 32 – a reminder that the earliest dollars you invest often become the most powerful, thanks to decades of compound growth working quietly in your favor.

Financial Clarity Creates Freedom

When I think about what I want for my own kids and for my clients’ children, it’s the ability to feel confident and assured making financial decisions from a place of understanding, not anxiety or fear. Ultimately, clarity is what enables financial freedom.

If you want to help your kids build good money habits but aren’t sure where to begin, we’re happy to share age-appropriate tools or help you frame these conversations in a way that fits your family.

 

Download the Budgeting Worksheet

 

Download the Saver vs. Procrastinator Tool

 

This material is distributed for informational purposes only. Investment Advisory services offered through Journey Strategic Wealth, a registered investment adviser registered with the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission (“SEC”). The views expressed are for informational purposes only and do not take into account any individual’s personal, financial, or tax considerations. Opinions expressed are subject to change without notice and are not intended as investment advice. Past performance is no guarantee of future results. Please see Journey Strategic Wealth’s Form ADV Part 2A and Form CRS for additional information.